Warning: I am writing a bit today about…Vaginas…If you are uncomfortable with slang terms, you probably should stop reading now.
Soooo..the other day, I was waxing eloquently about…well…no pun intended…waxing. I referred to my nether region as a “beaver” while bitching about all the stuff we do as women.
Then I just could not stop thinking about it. I don’t know about you, but mine does not look like a beaver… (See picture)
Yesterday, while driving home from dinner, …the girl spawn started laughing in the back seat. When I asked why, she told me that she saw a sign for a hotel that she thought said “Cameltoe Inn”….Uhhh, no hon, its “Camelot Inn”…Today, at lunch, a friend of mine was talking about her daughter wearing a pair of shorts and telling her she could not wear them again. They were so tight you could see her “lips”….huh…This is what lips look like. (See picture)
What the heck does a camel toe look like, really? (See picture)
Nor does it resemble a taco… (See picture)
I have kitties at home and I am here to tell you my vagina does NOT look like any of them. (See picture of Fred the kitty in my saved photos on this page)
Sooo..here I am thinkin about different slang terms for “it”…
Blue waffle, cha cha, fur pie, hoo ha, cooter, hot pocket, kitty, pussy, cootchie,peedie piedeee, poon tang, beef curtains,hair burger, whisker biscuit, tunnel of love, gash, pookie , axe wound, va jay jay, vajizzle, love muffin, pink canoe, cock pocket, bearded oyster and we must not forget women’s all-time favorite, the dreaded…drum roll please….Cunt.
Who the hell came up with these names? Anyone seen what a “blue waffle” looks like? Yup… GTS it… (That’s short for “Google that shit”)…it is GROSS. But…It aint real…how about a fur pie? Mine does not look like that either. All of the slang terms I found sound super….icky or bleck or just..stupid.
Men have used the word “cunt” to describe a vagina or what they perceive to be a bitchy woman.
Years ago I had the opportunity to see a play about..well…vaginas..Part of the play had an entire piece about that word…Cunt…I decided then and there that I was not gonna let anyone ever make me feel like that was a bad word. I will not give anyone any power by calling me a cunt ever again and thinking they have hurt me with this word. So it doesn’t bug me anymore. Now I can say it allll I want.. Cunt..heheh
Hmmm…ok….I’m done..had to get this off my chest..perhaps tomorrow I will write about wieners..(See picture)
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